Monomania Rules OK?

We have all had the unfortunate experience of speaking to people who cannot understand a word we are saying. It is not that they do not speak the same language as we do. The problem is that their way of looking at the world is so different from our own that they insist everything we say and do is something different to what it actually is. Someone insisting you are a thief and seeing your every movement as the first stage of an attempt to steal something for example.

In the 1970's one man who suffered from this ignorance more than most enjoyed a brief hour of fame. Life has not been too bad since. But is that any compensation for what he was subjected to by those around him? Judge for yourself.

The name of Gregory Gendle still gladdens the heart of a particular section of the population. He came to prominence in a television advertisement for the popular Licorice Allsorts. The tag line of the ad was "Every one's someone's favorite". Gendle appeared on screen for a few seconds as the narrator said: "While Gregory Gendle thinks only blue is beautiful - thanks a lot Greg". There is indeed a blue licorice allsort which is one of the more popular ones. Gendle had spent a lifetime preparing for this role. He had been expelled from several schools for looking out of the window at the sky all the time and listening to blues music to drown out all other sound. He had obtained a labouring job in a paint factory but soon lost it due to his reluctance to touch pots of non-blue paint. Living in a hostel on disability benefits due to this psychological problem he came to the notice of the advertising executives who had the licorice allsorts contract. He was persuaded to appear as himself and the ad launched his career in a quite unexpected way.

At the time Chelsea Football Club which had won major trophies a few years before was struggling under an enormous debt. The team wore blue and their theme song was 'blue is the colour'. A man who thought only blue was beautiful would clearly be a great asset to the club. Gendle was already a Chelsea fan which as in every other case was evidence of his psychiatric condition. Soon the club came calling. Gendle was asked to lead the crowd in singing on match days from a position on the touchline. His one eyed devotion to the Blues would set an example to all. Gendle could not actually sing but approached the role with an unnerving passion. The Blues could do no wrong in his eyes. Soon there was talk of promoting him to be press spokesman. He was never actually appointed to this role but the press always approached Gregory for a virulently pro-Chelsea quote so the effect was the same.

It was a couple of seasons before crowd violence at Chelsea matches got out of control. This was reported in the press as racist behaviour by whites towards blacks. On the contrary. The hooliganism was the logical conclusion of Gendle's touchline antics. White supporters objected to black supporters because they had been brought up to call them 'coloured' and their colour was not blue. Black supporters did not have the same problem because they thought of caucasians as 'white' which is not a colour. Nevertheless the culture of violence caused a great deal of harm to the club. Gregory himself disapproved of it and tried to unite fans behind the common love of blue. His efforts were in vain. Gendle's presence had proved far more of a hindrance than a help to the club and he was dismissed. The press could not speak to him anymore and he was banned from the ground. Greg could no longer be the public definition of the ultimate blue.

Greg did not object to being made the scapegoat for terrace violence. He was incapable of seeing anything objectionable in anything blue. He went back to the small flat in Fulham he was now renting and nurtured his passion further by inventing several new shades of the colour. All his clothes and furnishings were blue by this time. His fame preceded him however. Local kids got to know of his obsession and started to torment him by putting red items through his letter box. His devotion to blue now became total. He would wash his hands if he touched anything of another colour and would have to lie in a darkened room if he saw anything of another colour. He could cope with the green of the grass because blue and yellow made up the shade. Everything else however caused his nervous system to revolt. The more he suffered the more he was tormented by an unfeeling world. Eventually he lost the flat. Then he lost what remained of his dignity when he assaulted someone for urinating against a blue-painted railing. It seemed he could get no lower. But salvation as always was there all the time without him knowing it.

An ageing and jobless Gendle shut himself in his all-blue council flat. Then he saw an advertisement for a recruitment agency. It was called Blue Arrow. Surely they would understand and somehow find him a job? He found the address of the local office with great difficulty in the yellow pages he had dipped in dark blue ink. On his way there he was intercepted by someone who remembered him from Chelsea. This person was now a director of another recruitment agency called Blue Man. Could Gregory give them consultancy support by showing them how to be more blue? He accepted like a shot. Within six months he was a director himself. Only Gregory knew what is was to be totally blue and the importance of having blue people work for you. Only Gregory could identify at a glance how blue a person was even though only the bluest-looking were referred to him due to his condition. Gregory had found his calling. The Blue Man Group thrives today and remains the only employment agency specialising in blue people. Neither Gregory nor Blue Man would be where they are today without the other.

Today Gregory lives in a nine-bedroom all blue mansion deep in Hertfordshire. People see his success and feel that this compensates him for the ill effects of their ignorance. On the contrary. Gregory is still a bitter man. He has every reason to be. If the world cannot understand his way of looking at things that is the fault of the world. Should he change? A great many blue men who are clients of his company would rather die than lose their only path through life. One against the rest is an ace among other cards. Which has the higher value? Which is ultimately designed to win every glittering prize?